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It All Started Here

2008.07.31
"... This heart, I know,
To be long lov'd was never fram'd;
But something in its depths doth glow
Too strange, too restless, too untamed."


Matthew Arnold, "A Farewell" (1853)

I was 18. I moved to Rijeka, harbor city on the Croatian coast to commence my psychology studies. As a refugee (in my own country, funny that), I was given a free room in the dormitory. There was the door next to the communal bathroom that always seemed locked. After some investigation, the key was obtained and the Aladin's cave containing all these dusty old cameras and the dark room was opened to me - the whole new world opened up. Needles to say, I kept the existence of this room a secret for the next 5 years. It was mine.

This was one of the first pictures I took of myself that made me realize that photography is more than a nice visual treat. It is a key, for me, to understanding who I am and 'ordering' the world around me. It is my memory safe. The films and negatives may burn again, but ones I press that shutter, that moment will always stay with me.
20 Comments
wfrnk "The birth". :-)
wfrnk · 2008-07-31: 09:19
mariaps Fantastic post! Great beginning, you really are accomplished! :)
mariaps · 2008-07-31: 09:25
dhulsmeyer what an amazing story and an even more amazing find - cameras and a darkroom! that's pretty incredible.
dhulsmeyer · 2008-07-31: 09:29
Pikapol very touching story and the shot is amazing!
Pikapol · 2008-07-31: 09:30
declancorrigan simple shot! determined eyes! very complex person!


declancorrigan · 2008-07-31: 11:31
DancingDolphin Interesting story, thanks for sharing it...
DancingDolphin · 2008-07-31: 12:17
danci ;)...you know what I mean...
danci · 2008-07-31: 15:14
Dragana totally Danci, see you soon, very very soon ... love you
Dragana · 2008-07-31: 15:16
stormfish after you've constrcuted yourself, you'll have to deconstruct it all again.

it's a tedious process called life.

and the camwon't help, because it flattens your confusing, scary 3d reality into only 2d.

but i am glad to get the impression you're learning all that.
stormfish · 2008-07-31: 16:02
caroleagle Oh this is SO good. Saw the picture before I saw the words and looked at it a long time and thought how beautiful you look and how interesting the quality of the image is and then I scroll down and find you disagree... a secret darkroom makes me think of fairy tales.
caroleagle · 2008-07-31: 16:05
focussed I think its actually a very attractive photo. You look a little vulnerable. Your story could come straight from a movie script. What an exciting and surreal beginning to your photographic journey.
focussed · 2008-07-31: 16:17
ClaudePechabaden In your own country? I missed a little of the story. But it s poignant memories and words.
ClaudePechabaden · 2008-07-31: 17:50
yellodog Now that's showing us how it should be done. Nice work!
yellodog · 2008-08-02: 12:52
miguelcruz El espejo muestra una estampa lejana, un rostro que aún es desconocido... Me atrapan tus propuestas.
miguelcruz · 2008-08-03: 15:26
jenjung wonderful post and story - and what a great find in that dorm!
jenjung · 2008-08-05: 13:47
t2d4th how amazing is this photo and the story...wow!
t2d4th · 2008-08-06: 22:48
marcinescu yeap nothing to comment
marcinescu · 2008-08-10: 14:48
makaid I understand your feeling in a way. I realized photography was much more than fancy equipment and compositional techniques only recently while on my hiking trip.

I get this unique feeling as if I am alone and one with the world at the same time. There is a feeling of euphoria at the perfect shot as well.
makaid · 2008-08-10: 21:47
CwhatiC I love your eyes here. They seem to be vulnerable, asking what the hell is ahead of me.
CwhatiC · 2008-10-28: 18:15
thebaz i like it - b
thebaz · 2008-11-11: 13:26
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