Dates

by Stefan Fletcher June. 14, 2009 7024 views

Date we met: 22 June 1995
Date I asked her to marry me: 24 June 1995
Date she agreed: 25 June 1995
Date we married: 29 August 1996 (I wanted to marry her on her birthday, on the quite reasonable grounds that I would be less likely to forget both her birthday and our anniversary. My ex-wife is six months older than I and her grasp of English at the time was approximate. She said she didn't want to marry a “boy toy” , so we did it 3 days before.)
Date we separated: 18 March 2000 (my birthday)
Date these photos were taken: 12 April 2008
Date we were divorced: 22 December 2008
Date of last time we met: 13 June 2009

No drama, just I'm leaving Greece and that's it - she doesn't travel and I won't be coming back.

Not a bang, not even a whimper. Just a goodbye.

I realise these portraits are harsh, uncompromising, almost cruel. It certainly wasn't my conscious decision. My subject was 41 at the time and she was one of my first nudes. There were two sessions (separated by dinner), and she was feeling dejected and insecure at the time. She later told me I made her feel good about herself. In post-processing - given how little I knew about lighting at the time - I focused on the texture of her skin, how injured she felt (she'd just argued with her father), her fragility, her strength of character and her inability to find internal peace.

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There are 20 comments , add yours!
Karman 10 years, 3 months ago

Very nicely done. I prefer #8 over all, the mystery of what you think you see. Very heart touching/wrenching post. To make another feel good about who they are and how they look is a great gift to them. A act of kindness that is seldom forgotten. Sometimes a goodbye is all that is left. I wish happyness for you my friend.

10 years, 3 months ago Edited
Mademoiselle Marie 11 years, 8 months ago

jolies!

11 years, 8 months ago Edited
Leah De Guzman Huete 11 years, 11 months ago

artistic!!

11 years, 11 months ago Edited
Lynda 11 years, 11 months ago

Very brave of you to share your personal history like this. What a romantic you are proosing within 2 days of meeting someone! I hope you find happiness with somone new in your new life.

11 years, 11 months ago Edited
Kecskemétiné Nelli 11 years, 11 months ago

Beautiful farewell, and personal, too. Changes are always inspiring.

11 years, 11 months ago Edited
Susan Jane 11 years, 12 months ago

And the pictures are wonderful. She should be honored by them!

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Susan Jane 11 years, 12 months ago

oh my friend. you are making a big choice, and if it is what you need to do to free yourself, then definately do it (but I have enjoyed your pictures of Greece so very much!). Whats important is healing and learning. Dont repeat the same mistakes, no matter how tempting. Been there, much like you, and the pain only gets worse with each parting. The story has already been written. Start a new story.

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Stormfish 11 years, 12 months ago

you know, this is so much better than cheddargorge. but why do i compare. the story you tell here is extraordinary and made me want to read the book that you should write about it. or her. agreeing after 3 days to marry, live together for 4, separate and then take another 8 years to really part... i so see so much trouble and grief in this, and yet... it sounds like one of these old seafarer stories that we tell our children when we really want to make sense for them.

thank you for sharing this - provocative and uncorrupted by vanity as always! :-)

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Jordijoan 11 years, 12 months ago

Magistrales fotos de estudio para mirar e intentar aprender........geniales !!

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Mikkal Noptek 11 years, 12 months ago

Very interesting pictures and story.

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Tim 11 years, 12 months ago

and life goes on..

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Gerd Korts 11 years, 12 months ago

breath taking photos of a beautiful woman and a very exciting CV of a relationship, easy going last words but why the hell I have difficulties to believe them? :-)

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Monika 11 years, 12 months ago

maybe not a bang in you, but in me... a big visual and emotional bang indeed. i will avoid letting my thoughts flow this time (it would be a wide river) and just say that I believe something extraordinary beautiful can never be perfect and the other way around… you`ve enlightened her imperfections that make her breathtakingly beautiful and attractive…no, no cruelty and harshness here... I can hardly take my eyes off this wonderful symphony of images celebrating real ageless female beauty. Just a goodbye…? Hmmm.

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Doris 11 years, 12 months ago

A real woman. A real story.
A real good set.

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Carole Gledhill 11 years, 12 months ago

I have looked at these for ages. The longest I've been held by anything on here for a while. My first thought something along the lines of
"Wow, a REAL Woman"
As for the condensed life. It is oddly painful.

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Jarvo J 11 years, 12 months ago

Are you sure it wasn't so you could save on presents?
Getting her to pose naked 8 years after separating, you must be one silver tongued smoothie ;-)

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Michael Sakowicz 11 years, 12 months ago

Yes, emotional indeed. As far as the shots, I think I either like the first or the last the best; they are all very well done.

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Brian 11 years, 12 months ago

Very emotional post. Both in the pictures and in your comments. For me, #8 really stands out, very powerful image.

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
Dean Singleton 11 years, 12 months ago

Wow is right.

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
David 11 years, 12 months ago

Nice shots!

11 years, 12 months ago Edited
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